Thursday, June 5, 2008


I love the headlines from Spammers. I wish I could do that as a career. How much fun would it be to sit in a room all day writing ridiculous headlines for atrocious and dubious products/companies? You know, I'm thinking there are comfy couches and an espresso machine, laptops and WiFi. Oh wait, that's college.

AOL does a good job of blocking SPAM (along with a good amount of legitimate mail) but one got through today that made me chuckle:

"Why some people never let ED spoil their life. Here is there secret." First of all, who's ED? What if your name was Ed and now you have this limp dink affliction named after you? Well, the headline led to a cartoon which reminded me that I need to work on my song.

A few weeks back I traveled to Orlando for biz. I managed to squeeze in a little time for fun and had one day to visit with Hughie and get out on his new boat. The weather in Orlando is always sunny and warm. That is, until you just have ONE day to go boating. Then it rains like a Mother-F'er but only after you gone to all the trouble to get the boat out onto the lake. I'll spare you all of the details but two.

I'm driving(?) the boat at pretty high speed on an empty lake when the rain hit. It started gradually and I gunned the engine trying to get out from under the storm cloud. The harder it rained the faster I went. Soon, the rain was blinding me, stinging my face as we attempted to hide behind the short windshield. The rain came at us sideways and I eventually cut the engine before I ran it aground or killed a kayaker. We stopped and put up the small "bikini" top, about as big as one on a Jeep, for a modicum of shelter from the downpour.

Later in the day, the heavens opened up yet again, more fiercely than before. By now, my god-daughter had joined us to get some skiing in. The three us huddled as best we could, under the dash, when eventually a long stream of water ran off the top and down the back of my shorts. It was at that moment I knew I had to write a Country song entitled "It's Raining Down the Crack of my Ass".

Listen, I have to go to work now (you remember work, don't you?) but I'll return soon to post about motorcycling. My new seat arrived and I need to dodge some rain in the next few days to get my bike serviced, light bar installed, etc. I'll comment on the new Mustang seat as soon as I can. I still need a bike cover and one or two more things.

Have a great day.

A low, slow wave,

Joe Rocket