I'm not paranoid and I'm not feeling defensive about my purchase...much.
I spotted the golden blonde deerskin cap on the table amongst the tan, black and brown toppers. It stood out from all of the rest. I popped it on my melon and the effect was immediate.
I could see the admiring looks from the bevy of beautiful by-standers, my wife included. A lesser man would not have proceeded. It's so soft and luxurious. The funny little man in the head-to-toe leather overalls smiled and said "For $5, take it home and rub it!" He was right. Here was a perfectly sumptuous piece of deer hide.
With it on my dome, I felt a change come over me. Instantly more confident, I felt like a superhero. In a flash, I knew who I resembled; Mercury, Messenger of the Gods.
The physical resemblance to me, here, is uncanny. Under the protective layers of Polartec and fat, the chiseled Italian body is identical. He's got a cape and I might have to look into getting one of those.
Yes, his cap has wings and I may want to add some to my sporty new cap. Perhaps some black leather ones can be sewn on.
Here's a better comparison:
Go find yourself a spankin' new lid and wear it proudly. Now, I wonder where I can get a goat....?
Happy Sunday,
Joe Rocket